Easter Was Great Except For The Stupid Hats!

I have all good memories of Easter except for one thing--the stupid hats we had to wear. I remember mine was white with a blue ribbon on it and some flowers. I wish I could have found a picture of it to show you, but I couldn't find it. I know I saw one somewhere. Apparently my parents thought it was cute. I never liked dressing up anyhow on Sundays, but Easter was the worst of all!

Anyhow, let's move on to the things I liked about Easter growing up. I remember going to my grandma's house on my mom's side where I was first introduced to delicious chocolate covered marshmallow eggs. My aunt used to work at Towers Candies and they always had some for me. I still love chocolate marshmallow eggs and and not choosy about the brand. The Towers ones were big and the marshmallow was always soft, never hard or stretchy. Those marshmallow eggs were the highlight of Easter for me growing up.

I'm Getting More and More Like Dad (Writer's Workshop)

My dad and I used to always get comments that I looked so much like him. Probably because neither of us smiled very much.

We were both very stubborn and always felt our way of doing something was the "right" way.  Often times, we would butt heads because we already had our mind made up how to do something and were not interested in other alternatives.  I have worked at being more open to other ideas, and my dad even started listening finally to at least some of my ideas in his old age.

We are both reserved.  My dad was never much at making small talk and neither am I.  I much prefer just being with people I know well rather than meeting new people.  Neither of us are "social butterflies."

Neither of us are very interested in buying new clothes. We both wear our clothes for years, whether they are still in style or not. That's why I mostly just buy classic, traditional things that are timeless. Neither of us like dressing up. I am happiest in jeans, sweatshirts or t-shirts.

We both Like To Keep Our Blood.  Yesterday when I went for my annual check-up, they had a problem drawing my blood. I remembered how dad used to have to try to find a finger to prick for his diabetes testing every day and sometimes he would hardly get enough blood for it. He would rub it some before he tried to warm it up. Remembering this, I suggested running some hot water on my wrist to warm me up. Yes, it is summer and was a very nice warm day; however, the office had air conditioning blowing so hard it felt like 60 degrees in there. The technician even wore a fleece jacket!

The doctor gave up and decided to just do the one test for anemia. I sure hope I am not anemic! I don't need that problem yet. He was concerned because I lost a couple pounds, but I think it was because I just got finished doing sports camp in hot weather all week which was way more activity than I normally do.

I have some of my dad's good qualities though too.  

We are both organized.  My dad was quite organized even though his desks, tables, chairs and floors were a mess.  He knew where his things were most of the time.  I too have a place for everything and usually remember where my things are too. 

We both are list makers. My dad always had lists going of projects he wanted to work on, grocery lists, and even lists of what he ate. I do the same thing except I don't write a grocery list every week. I just print out a list of items we usually get and check the ones we want. I did this for my dad as well when I was his primary caregiver and started doing his grocery shopping for him.

We are both very generous and helpful. He used to teach boys in Sunday School and now I do. We both get so involved in working on projects we care about that we can work for hours and forget to eat. Neither of us have any trouble sleeping and are both early risers and neither of us are night owls. Hoot! Hoot!

My dad told me over and over he didn't know what he'd do without me when he was in his 80s and I was his primary caregiver. I know he was very proud of me and loved me very, very much.  I am glad I am so much like my dad!  He was such a good person and got along with everyone.  (Mostly because he kept his mouth shut.)

This is one of Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop posts in response to: What does your child do that reminds you most of yourself? How does it make you feel?

To find out more about my book and why I wrote it, read the Foreword here. Tweet This

Cameras and Kids

My dad was always taking pictures—mostly slides and movies. I remember how I used to hate getting my picture taken, especially when he had to bring out the bright flood lights to take movies indoors. We'd all groan but later enjoyed watching them! I remember my parents got a little family tree photo stand that had all six of our pictures in it and none of us kids liked it. We kept turning it backwards and my mom kept turning it back when she would notice it. Maybe that’s why I got to like taking pictures because then I was behind the camera where it was safe.

A camera can be a good gift for a child. I had a lot of fun taking pictures with mine. I took pictures of goofy things, like my dad’s bristles on the back of his head. My parents let me take pictures of anything I wanted and never said I shouldn't take something because it would be wasting the film (like I'd be tempted to say if roles were reversed). I wonder if the camera would still work.

I don’t know how old I was when I got my first camera, but it wasn’t fancy. It is an Imperial Mark XII Flash but I don't have the flash attachment anymore. It just snaps open to load the film but I don't even know if they still make the kind of film it uses. The film went in there and after each shot I had to wind the film forward. I looked it up on eBay and found one exactly like it with an asking price of $103! Ha, ha. Good luck getting that, I say! There were no bids on it. I thought of trying to sell mine on eBay except I printed my name on the bottom of it in marker so doubt if anyone would want it, not to mention the fact that I don't even know if it works. I'd be happy to get $5 bucks for it!

Taking pictures is fun! I went through a long line of different cameras including the disc, the Polaroid, the 35mm and now my digital. Cameras sure have changed a lot but I believe my love for taking pictures started because of my dad and that first positive experience I had taking those silly pictures.

To find out more about my book and why I wrote it, read the Foreword here.
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Loving Memories Of My Grandma Arlettaz

Grandmas are the best! My Grandma Arlettaz (Harry’s mother) was always active. She became a widow when my dad was only three years old and never remarried. She was a very thin old lady when I knew her who loved me very much. I found some old slides of us together which was the inspiration for this post. She helped my mom take care of me when I was born and got the blame when I needed glasses in first grade because she let me sit too close to watch TV when I had the chicken pox. I used to love staying at her house over night sometimes.

A Tip For Parents—Split Those Shakes!

Growing up, my mom used to cook a big dinner using the slow cooker. For several years we always had mashed potatoes, a vegetable, brown-n-serve rolls and some kind of meat for Sunday dinner. It would always be ready when we got home from church and tasted great!

When I started writing my book, I asked my brother and sisters if they had any funny memories about dad and my brother mentioned that he remembered how dad would always fix our dog, Brownie, a special plate on Sundays. I had forgotten about this. Brownie loved these Sunday dinners too!

My Earliest Memory--A Mouse In the House!

Kathy at The Junk Drawer had a post "What Was Your Very First Memory" which I commented on and thought it might be good to post about it here.

We used to live in Garrettsville. This is a picture of our first house that my mom and dad worked together on building. As you can see, it was pretty much in the boonies with just open field all around.

I don’t remember much before I started school but I do remember this because I was afraid my mom was going to land on me and squish me! (She was not a small person.) I must have been 4 years old sitting on the couch one night. All of a sudden, my mom screamed really, really LOUD and jumped on top of the couch right next to me!

She saw a mouse in our house! She was terrified of the cute little things and told my dad, she couldn't live there anymore. She can't live with mice in the house. Harry, being the loving husband that he was, put the house up for sale and we moved to Parma (a suburb of Cleveland). Here is a slide he took of mom and me at out new home playing a word game also dated 1958. I've always enjoyed playing games, all kinds. This is probably why--she started me early.

I found this slide which was taken after the house was sold and dated 1958. Harry was great at labeling things and a very detailed person which sometimes got on my nerves, especially when he'd explain things like I was a 2-yr.-old sometimes. Anyhow, because he dated that slide, I am able to figure out how old I was at the time. The one of my mom and me he listed both our full names as well as described the type of game we were playing. I'm glad he did now even though it may have seemed silly at the time.

Tip: Always label the back of your pictures with names and dates. Years later, it helps bring more meaning to the people who find them.

One of Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop prompts this week is: Explain a time there was an emergency. What “mode” did you go into? Freaking out, calm and collected, etc. I modified it a bit by sharing about my mom freaking out in what she considered to be an emergency.

To find out more about my book and why I wrote it, read the Foreword here.
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You Want Me To Read About SNAKES? (Writer's Workshop)

I had many books as a kid and enjoyed seeing them again when clearing out my dad’s house after he died. My mom enrolled me in a Children’s book club because she wanted me to like reading and encouraged me to enjoy books. I had a green bookcase, built by dad of course, filled with books but when asked what I would like read I would choose the snake section in The Book of Knowledge. I liked snakes back then but more than that I loved seeing my parents cringe when I’d ask them to read about the different snakes. Although it wasn’t really a children’s book, it certainly was the one my parents hated reading to me the most!

Even today I find snakes fascinating to watch at the zoo when they’re on the go. This is a picture of a Python that I took while curled up on top of a fake elephant's head. I wouldn’t want one in my house though.

Is there something your child likes that makes you cringe? What book do you remember your parents reading to you?

This post is part of Mama Kat’s Workshop: What Children’s book do you hate reading to your child? Go check out more posts there or participate yourself.

To find out more about my book and why I wrote it, read the Foreword here.
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Aunt Dorothy Was Right!

After writing my last post about missing our family gatherings, look what I found when searching through my photo album for the picture to go along with my previous post: a couple notes from 1962 that I had sent to my Aunt Martha and Aunt Dorothy. I was just 9 years old at the time I wrote these, but my aunts were very pleased with them. I remember those animal stickers I had too!

Here's what I wrote to my Aunt Martha:
I enclosed a sheet of paper with a picture of a house and tree and flowers on the one side (nothing spectacular) but on the other side it said "Happy Martha's Day."

Here's what I wrote to my Aunt Dorothy:


The best part though was the typewritten note enclosed from my Aunt Dorothy! I can't figure out what I was thinking on some of those problems, but my aunt said they were all right!

She was right when she wrote: "I am going to keep this first letter I received from you and when you are grown up, you will like like to read it too."

Finding these with her letter was so sweet. I did enjoy reading them too now that I am grown up and it seemed like I had a little visit with them at the holidays after all! I thought it was cool that the envelopes were still saved too! Postage was only 4 cents back then!

Do you encourage your children to write to their aunts, uncles or other family members? Things written at the time may not seem like much, but finding them later is a sweet thing. I remember when I was cleaning out my dad's house after he died, going through the dresser drawers I found some notes my grandma Nieman wrote when she was living with us. She wrote that she liked hearing me play the piano and that I did real good tonight. I never knew she liked it when I played. I wish she had told me then!

To find out more about my book and why I wrote it, read the Foreword here.
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What's Your Holiday Wish?

My Holiday Wish is Being with Family and Friends

The holidays are near and dear to your heart. You don't need much to make you happy this time of year. As long as you're able to be near the people you love most, you are content. It's really that simple. You want nothing more than a full house of people celebrating the season. It doesn't matter if it's your house or not, just as long as everyone is there. And if someone doesn't happen to be around during the holidays, you think about him or her often. You get very sentimental this time of year.

Take the quiz to see What's Your Holiday Wish?

and share your results in the comments.

This quiz is right on for me. I do get sentimental around the holidays and think about years past when I spent holidays with my parents, grandparents, aunts, family and friends.

Thinking back, when we were kids we'd each get a game and then we spent the afternoon learning to play them all. It was always a challenge to decide what to buy for my parents. We always managed to find something they could use though. After I got married, one Christmas they came to our house, but usually we would go to theirs because it was easier on them. After my mom died and my dad had all the cats, we would always buy things for them. My dad got a big kick out of watching them play with new toys or lounging in their new beds.

We went to my sister's several years which was always fun. I always liked buying for her kids. When her four kids grew up though, it got to the point where we would give them gift certificates and they'd give us gift certificates. After that, I suggested we just get together and don't bother exchanging gifts, it seemed silly. So that's what we started doing. She had the biggest house so it was logical for us to all go over there.

When we were kids, we always looked forward to going to grandma's for Christmas. I had three unmarried aunts who also lived with my dad's mother and they would always give us nice things. I remember thinking how funny they were because every year when we visited at Christmas, they would still have packages sitting there that they hadn't opened and they'd say every year, "They look so pretty, we hate to open them.!" I never understood that! Of course, the adults were at the big dining room table and us kids were off to the side at a smaller "kids" table usually, but when we got older, they included us at the big table. I liked that!

For New Year's Eve we used to get together with my mom's best friend's family. They had a daughter my age and two older boys, one of which I sort of had a crush on. He was always nice to me and even taught me how to play Chess. I always looked forward to these times because it was so much fun playing games together.

I am glad we have movies, video and photographs of past Christmases. I like watching the videos especially because I can hear my parents voices and it seems they are back at least for that little time. I encourage you to take pictures at your get-togethers.

This year we are going to visit with Gerard's sister and her adult children. I think it's very nice of her to invite us to join them for Christmas dinner. I think I'll bring a camera along, maybe even my Flip for some video.

I wish all of you a very Merry Christmas and hope you enjoy being with your families for the holidays! Make the most of them while you can!

To find out more about my book and why I wrote it, read the Foreword here.
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Praying Before Meals and Family Devotions

When I visited "The Little Mermaid's" blog and saw some prayers that she has been taught, it reminded me of the one we used to say before meals growing up. It went like this:

Come Lord Jesus, be thou our guest, and let this food to us be blessed. Amen.

It was short but had a neat concept of inviting Jesus to join us for our meals. It became repetitious to me though and praying before meals is something I really no longer do. I know Jesus gave thanks to the Father before he ate so maybe I should too. But it also says not to use vain repetitions when we pray. I start my day with prayer and pray throughout the day, so don't feel it's necessary to pray before every meal. I know it's expected at Christian gatherings and I don't have any objection to doing it, so I do when I attend those things where there is food. Even then though, it seems kind of ritualistic to me.

Praying before meals was really the only formal "spiritual" instruction or training we got at home even though my mom and dad were both Christians. They mostly taught by example. I remember seeing my mom reading the Bible when she was preparing to teach her Sunday School lesson or for the Jr. High youth group but can't remember ever seeing my dad read his Bible outside of church. He never learned the order of the books either--probably because he always had difficulty memorizing things. He just always used the Table of Contents in the front.

I remember at one time our pastor preached about the parents taking responsibility for the spiritual training of their children in the home and that families should have a time of devotions together. He referred to it as a family altar. My dad didn't want to do it and took no part in it, but let my mom give it a try. She would get us kids all together in the early evening and tried leading some kind of devotional time. We didn't like it and felt awkward. I don't remember how old we were but I do remember it didn't last for long, maybe a week or perhaps a couple weeks but no more than that.

I never understood why my dad didn't support her more in this effort but apparently he felt it wasn't necessary. Perhaps he felt it wasn't her place to do it or perhaps he just didn't like the minister telling him what he should do. I was just happy he wasn't for the idea at the time.

Do you have family devotions? Do you pray together as a family? I think it would be a wonderful thing to do if you start early so it doesn't feel so awkward for everyone. Do you think the saying, "Families who pray together, stay together" is true? These days, at least in the U.S. it seems families are doing great if they can manage to have one meal a day together.

Good Things About Funerals

I can think of two very good things about funerals:

(1) IT BRINGS THE FAMILY TOGETHER.

Growing up our family was not what you'd call close. We did not do gift exchanges at Christmas with our relatives and the extent of our visiting relatives was our grandmothers and the aunts who lived with them. That was pretty much the only contact we had with our extended family. Once in awhile, I think a total of 3 or 4 times, we visited our cousins in Mansfield (which was about an hour's drive). I remember one party we went to at another cousin's house. Other than that, the only cousin I saw on a semi-regular basis was Carol because she's a hairdresser so I went to her for haircuts and perms. When an uncle or aunt died, that's when our whole family would get together. It was always awkward because I never would know who certain people were that I should know.

When my mom died my foster brother, John, and one foster sister, Pam, didn't even come to her funeral. I think it was because they didn't know about it in time because we had no idea where they were, no phone or address for them. Since then though, we did get in touch. When my dad died, it was the first time in years that I saw Pam and John and first met John's family. That was a really good thing. It was such a momentous occasion that Michelle's, daughter even took a picture of us all together--one with our spouses and one with just us. (Michelle is my other foster sister.)

(2) WE SEE OLD FRIENDS AGAIN.

It was actually fun seeing some old friends again who came to the funeral home to console me and pay their respects. My best friend that I grew up with came! We exchange Christmas greetings but I've only been to her house once since we've been married. I mention her in "My Funny Dad, Harry" so I told her about the book I wrote and she bought it and passed it along for her sister to read as well. It was also great seeing friends from my old church again.

I recently attended viewing hours for the father of brothers I had in the youth group from years ago. It was wonderful seeing them again and they were very surprised to see me since we hadn't been in touch at all for such a long time. They both live nearby and we exchanged email addresses so we can keep in touch now.

I think this aspect of funerals is a glimpse of what heaven will be like. It'll be one huge happy reunion with our loved ones who have gone on ahead and people we've known throughout our lives who we seldom see. I have lots of questions about this such as: "Since we get new heavenly bodies, how will we recognize each other?" "What about age--will we be the age we were when we died, or be younger or older?" At any rate, I really look forward to seeing my parents again!

John 11:25-27 says:

25Jesus said to her, "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; 26and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?"

27"Yes, Lord," she told him, "I believe that you are the Christ,[b] the Son of God, who was to come into the world."

I John 5:9-12 says:

9We accept man's testimony, but God's testimony is greater because it is the testimony of God, which he has given about his Son. 10Anyone who believes in the Son of God has this testimony in his heart. Anyone who does not believe God has made him out to be a liar, because he has not believed the testimony God has given about his Son. 11And this is the testimony: God has given us eternal life, and this life is in his Son. 12He who has the Son has life; he who does not have the Son of God does not have life.

It is so comforting to know Jesus and have the assurance of being re-united with our loved ones again.


(3) THE FAMILY GETS SOME VERY PRETTY FLOWERS.

Here is a picture of my cat, Spunky Doodle (the one I got as a kitten from dad's), enjoying the flowers we brought home from my dad's funeral.

Our Big Wall Chalkboard

As I was blog hopping the other day, I came across a post that reminded me of my dad at Your Fun Family titled Fun Paints For Kids Rooms.

One of the things my dad did for us kids that really impressed my best friend who lived next door was putting up a BIG chalkboard for us. At the time, we lived in a double house and used it all for just our family. My dad bought some chalkboard paint and put it on the one wall of the upstairs dining room! He made it about the same size as blackboards were at school and then added a wooded chalktray. We got a lot of use out of that and when we moved, he made another one for us in the rec room he made in the basement.

Having one in the rec room was especially handy for keeping score and letting our guests draw on it at parties. Such an easy thing and yet we used it a lot!

When I got married and bought my own house, I asked my dad to put a big chalkboard in our basement too. I was just thought it was such a handy thing to have and would have missed it. I used it a lot to keep track of my eBay sales.

Harry did all this work by himself! What a dad!

Must Read for Those Who Enjoy Memoirs

Here is a book review I received yesterday from Cindy Oldham:

Cindy Oldham

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My Funny Dad, Harry
By
Karen Arlettaz Zemek


‘My Funny Dad, Harry” is a unique, interesting collection of memories about a gentle man who was a devoted husband and father. His daughter, author Karen Arlettaz Zemek leads us through the early years of her life and shows us how she and her father had a special bond that continued growing throughout their lives.

Mrs. Zemek allows the reader to share in her father’s love of cats through the many pictures sprinkled through the book and the memories that are tied to how he loved and cared for them. She portrays her father thoughtfully and eloquently as she became his caregiver during the last years of his life. This is a memoir that allows the reader to meet her father and is a loving tribute to his life and the many memories his daughter chose to share with the world.

This book is a pleasure to read and will make you smile and laugh as well as bring a tear to your eyes as you read this lovingly crafted memoir. My Funny Dad, Harry is a must read for those who enjoy memoirs.

(For more reviews, check out "My Funny Dad, Harry" at Amazon.com and after reading, be sure to participate in the book discussion on Amazon at the bottom of the book detail page. Thank you!)